Orbiting: The toxic dating trend worse than ghosting

Many people who have experienced ‘ghosting’ - abruptly cutting ties with someone you were seeing or had shown a romantic interest in - will tell you how terrible it feels. So you can imagine the confusion and frustration one may feel when the person who ghosted them in real life, still interacts with their content on social media. There’s a name for this shady move, and it is, orbiting.

How to tell if you are the orbiter

We all tend to get curious occasionally about what an ex or a previous one-night-stand is up to and sometimes, we give in to that curiosity, and one of the best places to keep tabs on someone is social media.

So you not only check them out on these platforms, but you are liking their Instagram post, you favourite their tweet and watch their Snap stories. A psychotherapist and relationship specialist, Lisa Bateman explains:

When you're still liking somebody else's stuff, you're staying attached. You're sending a message that you're still seeing into the other person's life.

You probably left them their messages on read, you don’t return their calls, leaving them confused. Constantly interacting with their social media when you have cut all IRL ties with them is unhealthy to you and frustrating to the other person.

What if you are the ghosted orbiter?

Maybe you are the one with whom they cut all ties without so much as an explanation. You lurk around their social media to let them know you are still available should they change their mind.

Deep down, you know how pathetic that is and to clinical psychologist, Wendy Walsh explains how this may harm your mental health:

When we post on social media, we post the best pictures of us, where we look like we're having the most fun. And every time you see that, you will re-injure yourself. It’ll be harder for you to get over it.

As hard as it may be, you need to do these three things for your own sanity: Delete! Block! Unfollow!

Read more:

⋙ Oystering: The new dating trend that is here to stay

⋙ Zero Dating: What is this new dating trend?

⋙ Soft launching: Social media’s most subtle dating trend