People pleasing: Stop doing these ‘nice' things at work

We all want to have decent, cordial relationship with the people we work with, after all, you spend more than half your waking time with them. However, some people tend to go the extra mile to ensure that the people around them are comfortable or happy with them. People pleasing affects your mental health and self-worth. Here’s how to know if you are the office pushover.

Signs of workplace people pleasing

An article published in Metro.co.uk references Tracy Secombe, the author of ‘From People Pleaser To Soul Pleaser’ and a coach who works to help people connect with who they’re really meant to be. Secombe lists a breakdown of the ‘nice’ things you may be doing at workplace that shows you’re a people pleaser.

• You take so much pride in being known as the person who will always get stuff done
• You are always stressing about the quality of your work
• You are that person that everyone can count on to say ‘yes’ to doing over time, going in at the weekend and taking on more work
• You’re a chameleon, shape-shifting to be whatever different people at work need you to be in that moment
• You feel validated when you receive praise, but have crashing lows when you receive negative feedback or criticism

How this can harm you

The signs enumerated above may not sound scary, but over time, they can do a number on your mental health and how you relate to your colleagues. Talking to Metro.co.uk, Tracy Secombe said:

The people-pleasing roller coaster of emotions can leave you feeling drained of energy. This can impede your concentration or even sleep patterns. People-pleasing becomes a problem when you need another person to be pleased by what you do or say. That is, you can only feel good if they are pleased by your actions.

Read more:

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⋙ The ‘complainer’ and other toxic workplace personalities to be aware of

⋙ Is your workplace toxic? Here are four signs to look out for